This week I thought I’d talk about buying presents for men. I know, the dreaded birthday/Christmas season duty. My partner, Rob, is impossible to buy for. I usually like to stick to getting people something that relates to their hobbies, but Rob could not have more unhelpful interests. He likes cars, dogs, and alcohol. There are only so many things you can get with one of those three things on it, or some related joke, before it starts to get old. He’s got a shelf full of mixology books he never reads, and a taste for extremely expensive rums which he drinks at about a thimble a week. We’ve had to set up a cellar under the starts because unsurprisingly, everyone else in his life has the same gift-giving problem as me and have given up trying. I think he’s got so many bottles gathering dust I could become a rum-only alcoholic and he wouldn’t even notice the dwindling supply.
He’s also very no-frills. So I can’t buy more than one thing until it breaks. One keyring. One wallet. One special glass. One fancy shirt. One joke shirt. One patterned pair of socks. He even told me, when we first started dating, not to bother even trying with car-related accessories because chances are he wouldn’t like it and wasn’t afraid to say so. So that was that. I’m just holding out until we move somewhere pet-friendly and I’ll have one birthday covered by buying him a dog. That is, if he doesn’t buy himself one first, which has happened an uncanny amount of times over the years.
I’ve tried the whole adventure gift route, but the last time he’d splurged a little on alcohol and gotten drunk he not so subtly told me not to do it again. I think he doesn’t like being told what to do. And don’t get me started on the whole ‘you don’t have to buy me anything’ argument. Obviously I have to get him something. He always buys me a gift!
I have to say, when Rob told me casually he was thinking of growing a beard I almost squealed in delight. A new avenue! I know it’s not much, but Rob doesn’t half-ass anything so I knew he would want to grow the perfect beard, so to speak. With his birthday right around the corner I was saved! I did some internet scouring and came across this men’s grooming brand, Percy Nobleman. It looked classy enough to adhere to his expensive taste, without any garish branding or fussy extras. I bought a few different bits, and when he opened the box he looked so surprised! And I kid you not, he turned to me and said ‘this is exactly what I wanted.’ I was over the moon!
I was worried about the dreaded pash rash, but his growth has been so soft I cannot complain! He looks refined, yet rugged, and I am all for it. AANNNDD let’s not forget, those products run out faster than a bottle of rum! Endless pressies from me, thank goodness. Thank you Percy! Have any tips on what to buy for the unbuyable man? Please let me know!! If he decides to shave again I’ll be stuck!